BREAKING [the] NEWS [cycle]
"We were stranded on a heathland west of Shipwreck like an unhappy family of arthritic brolgas. Our mission had been to find a rare banksia and our success had been achieved so quickly we were faced with the prospect of returning before we’d even popped the plugs on our battered Aladdin vacuum flasks.
We stood there surveying the scene of our triumph in doleful exhilaration. We were boffins mostly so the emotion came as easily to us as our woeful choice of tailors..."
ONE STOP SHOP
A quick at-a-glance value breakdown of Australia’s big issues of the day
"Yuwa yuwa yuwa, I love those mangy dogs. They sleep in my bed, no one comes inside. I don’t trust those stupid doctors, I know what’s wrong myself, not them..."
"Dim Sim prices are predicted to increase by over 400% later this month. The predicted spike is the inadvertent result of the Sea Shepherd’s War on Whalers..."